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Helping Children

Posted On 5/23/2017 By Admin

Life is something we make, and death is the culmination of all those efforts, combined they address the complexity of life’s journey. Upon our death, our struggles end, but in today’s chaotic society, those struggles can still have an impact on those left behind.


When a loved one dies, we all feel and show our grief in different ways. However, according to kidshealth.org, how children cope with the loss depends on things like their age, how close they felt to the person who died, and the support they receive. If you are a parent, grandparent, or guardian of a child who has lost a loved one: Be honest with children and encourage questions; create an atmosphere of comfort and openness; and send the message that there’s no one right or wrong way to feel.


Here are some things that can help:


  • When talking about death, use simple, clear words, and approach your child in a caring way to break the news that someone has died. Pause to give your child a moment to take in your words.


  • Listen and comfort, some kids cry, some ask questions, and others seem not to react at all – each is fine. Stay with your child to offer hugs or reassurance, answer any questions or just be together for a few minutes.



  • Put emotions into words in the days, weeks, and months following the loss. Talk about your own feelings: it helps kids be aware of and feel comfortable enough to say what they’re thinking and feeling.
  • Tell your child what to expect, death of a loved one means changes in your child’s life, head off any worries or fears by explaining what will happen.


  • Talk about funerals and rituals, and allow children to join in viewings, funerals, or memorial services. Tell your child ahead of time what will happen. People might cry and hug, say things like, “I’m sorry for your loss,” or, “My condolences.” You might need to explain burial or cremation.



  • Give your child a role, an active role can help children master an unfamiliar and emotional situation such as a funeral or memorial service. Let your child decide if they want to take part, and how - read a poem, pick a song to be played, gather some photos to display, or make something.


  • Help your child remember the person, recalling and sharing happy memories helps heal grief and activate positive feelings. Don’t avoid mentioning the person who died.



  • Respond to emotions with comfort and reassurance, ask about feelings and listen. Some kids may temporarily have trouble concentrating or sleeping, or have fears or worries. Support groups and counseling can help kids who need more support.


  • Help your child feel better. After a few minutes of talking and listening, shift to an activity or topic that helps your child feel a little better. Play, make art, cook, or go somewhere together.



  • Give your child time to heal from the loss, remembering the person with love, and letting loving memories stir good feelings that support us as we go on to enjoy life.


If you have questions about supporting a child through grief, estate planning, cremation and cemetery services, or for funeral pre-planning in Etobicoke, contact Ridley Funeral Homes at 416-259 3705 or email contactus@ridleyfuneralhome.com

today to create special gatherings for the special people in your life.